me teach cold mail

ill show how you can love it

December 23, 2024

In partnership with

Guys.

What made you open this mail?

Your undying love for updates from Inagiffy? The subject line that caught your eye? Or just how organic that email notification hit you in the feels?

Answer: All three.

Nailed it.

This entire edition is about how we perfected cold emails for a client.

But hey, if you’re too busy (or just too cool to care), leave the headache to us.

Is how every horror movie—I mean, cold email—starts.

You've heard of A/B testing, right? But have you ever tried testing personalities?

We gave it a whirl with X and Y. Let’s see what the janta likes.

Say hi to X.

She’s sweet, she’s kind, she’s got big dreams—and she wants you to know it.

Inspiring? Yes. A little bit too perfect? Absolutely. You’re low-key jealous of her and her flawless “I’m killing it” vibes.

Girl, I get it—you’re spending in dollars.

Now, meet Y.

He’s the mentor who actually believes in your potential—without the whole “you can be anything” bogus.

He’s direct, no fluff, and definitely not here to tell you what you want to hear. Efficient, to the point, and with zero tolerance for nonsense.

Take a wild guess at which one absolutely crushed it (and by a landslide).

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Is how you squeal when your situationship texts back, isn’t it?

That was me when the replies started pouring in.

So, let’s analyse why Y’s mail took the crown:

⦁ Straight shooter: Y didn’t beat around the bush. X was busy writing a novel about how great she is.

⦁ No need to prove It: Y sounded like he knew what he was doing without saying “I’m great.” X’s email was basically “Look at me, I’m perfect.”

⦁ Less pep talk, more action: Y got to the point. X was more about “You can do it” with no actual help.

It’s all about playing it cool—no desperation—just the right mix of charm and intrigue.

And when they reply? Oof. Game on.

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I know. Writing cold mails is an art.

Audience deaf? Here’s how to get them the hearing aid:

⦁ Subject lines that slap
Make it weird. Make it bold. Make it impossible to ignore.

⦁ Personalize like you’re a stalker
Mention their work, recent posts, or even their dog’s name

⦁ Keep it shorter than your attention span
Get in, pitch, and get out before they close the tab.

⦁ End with a hook, not a goodbye
Give them a reason to reply. Ask a question, drop a stat, or tease something spicy.

⦁ Follow up like it’s your job (because it is)
Politely, of course. Be that persistent-but-likable character.

There’s so many more tips that I'd love to share.

Now, if you do it right, you’ll see the walls have ears.

Give it a shot; write me a cold mail too about what you do, and I'll rate it for you.